Pavarotti needs a golf cart, a lack of ‘distinct’ odors, and sofas on six-inch risers. Christina Aguilera needs Flintstones chewable vitamins, soy cheese, and a roll of film. Aretha Franklin needs a hotel room below the sixth floor and a $25,000 cash downpayment on her fee, handed directly to her. David Copperfield needs grilled boneless chicken breast with Teriyaki sauce ”at a moment’s notice.”
No, these are not Christmas lists to Santa, but contract requirements of touring artists, as laid out in their backstage contract riders, lovingly collected and preserved by The Smoking Gun (thanks for the link, Derek).
For those who don’t work with professional touring artists, backstage or contract riders are attached to performance contracts, and outline exactly what’s expected during the artist’s visit, and who will provide it. Quirky rider requests are legendary in the business — such as a bowl of only green M&Ms or dressing rooms appointed entirely in white. A quick read of a rider can offer an interesting and bizarre glimpse into an artist’s psyche.
While it’s easy to write off the odd demands to hubris or vanity, an associate of mine who books these artists suggests: ”You try living your life in a different place 150 days of the year, and see what sort of environmental demands you make.”
A line in the Foo Fighter’s rider sums up this perspective rather well:
Dearest Reader — This rider is comprised of things that make the band rock you like a proverbial hurricane! Please make every effort to provide the following list. Please do not surreptitiously hack through things to save a buck or two. The silly items like gum and candy bars make a difference to these boys that are far from their families and friends.
Then the rider demands four pairs of white tube socks (US size 10-13) and four pairs of medium boxer shorts.
I get so tired of the outlandish demands touring artists make under the guise of their “Rider.” After 25 years of working as many as 100 shows annually, the fulfillment of line items listed has proven itself to be more of a comedy than a neccessity. A few moments at The Smoking Gun website will attest to this.
While it is true that life on the road has unusual hardships, the fact remains that no one is forced into it. They do it for the monetary gain. It is a job: you go work, make your money, then go home. We are not talking peanuts, either. This is big bucks. Big Big Bucks, usually paid weeks in advance; always paid in full before the talent ever leaves the stage.
Simple math will show that it is impossible for any ontourage to physically consume the vast quantities of food and drink called for in these riders. I have seen beverages alone top out at over 7 gallons per person. I have seen food items top out at over twenty pounds per person. I have seen ten dollar bath towels used by bus drivers to wipe mud off their chrome wheels, then tossed on the ground like rags.
I wonder just how much of these NECCESSARY items would remain if the costs were subtracted from the artists’ gross? Very little, friends, VERY little.
It is only the most inexperienced and niave promoters that even attempt to fill every rider nuance. Tour managers laugh their asses off every time they see it. They know it is all a big joke. My advice would be to spend the money on high quality production sound, lighting, and crews. The rest of it can be redlined, or simply ignored. Let the talent huff & puff all they want–they are adept at these antics anyway. In all my years of doing this, from both sides of the fence, NOT ONE TIME have I seen the talent NOT PERFORM. And, believe me, there were places that deserved it. At the end of the day it all simply amounts to take the money and RUN!
***Misspelled words and poor grammer have been left in so as to be consistant with “rider-ese.”