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THE essayist, Christian, feminist and political progressive is the latest subject of the Trust Me On This series I’m handling for Salon. The Bay-Area-based Lamott, perhaps best known for the book Bird by Bird, spoke to me about a subject central to her new collection, Small Victories — forgiveness. Here is the story.
Turns out that while she knows forgiveness is important to her, it doesn’t come easy. 
Forgiveness has become a pursuit more important to me than almost anything. Because as I said in an old book, it’s not my strong suit. I always joke that I wasn’t one of those Christians who was heavily into forgiveness – that I was the other kind; that I was reform. But it’s so awful to be a person who doesn’t forgive; in my experience the willingness to change down deep always comes from the pain of not changing… I really believe that earth is forgiveness school – I really believe that’s why they brought us here, and then left us without any owner’s manual.
Her whole piece — which came out of discussion with yours truly — is worth reading. I’ve got a few more of these coming before the week is out.
The genesis of the “flavor” of Christianity is well described by Ellis Potter in “Three Theories of Everything”….”before there was any creation, when there was only God, there was already trust and love in reality because there was already a fulfillment of the need to be seen and be heard and make a difference and be wanted. Each of the three persons of God fills the needs of the other persons, and does so by emptying Himself for the others. Jesus empties Himself for the Father and the Holy Spirit. For this reason, the center of reality in Jesus is not in Jesus, it’s in the Father and the Holy Spirit. Each of the persons of God is similarly other centered rather than centered in Himself. Such is the Bible’s depiction of absolute reality: a totally other centered God. This other centeredness is the source of Gods energy….the Bible gives a name to this energy when it says God is love….it is the energy of life. It is the foundation of all reality.”
This book is short and can be read in 1 to 2 hours. I recommend it for anyone wanting to know more about Christianity.
But forgiveness implies the existence of a universal standard. If there is no standard that has been broken, there is no need to forgive. In contrast to Ms. Lamott, I beieve God did leave us an owner’s manual, or standard.
It is general : the heavens are telling of the glory of God (Psalms 19)
It is specific: the Law of the Lord is perfect, restoring the soul (Psalms 19) and, For the Word of God is living and active and sharper than any two edged sword, and piercing as far as the division of souls and spirit, joints and marrow, and able to judge the thoughts and intentions of the heart. (Hebrews 4)
And, in contrast to other religions, it is personal: In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God and the Word was God…..and the Word became flesh and dwelt among us…(John 1). He who knew no sin became sin on our behalf so that we might become the righteousness of God in Him. (2 Corinthians 5)
I would agree with Russell’s statement on how He did leave us an owners manual. And for me that is the Bible. Because we are on this earth I believe everyone of us struggles to forgive, searching for a greater purpose and Hope for something better. In saying this, I have been blessed in many ways in my life but I will always consider myself a struggling christian because I am a sinful human being. Taking one day at a time. I know forgiveness frees you as well as the perpetrator. It’s telling your heart to follow through and asking God to give you that strength. The freedom that follows needs to be remembered and will make it easier each time.