The parody newspaper The Onion has a fabulous tradition of satirizing the arts within its pages…from the article on Congress’ accidental approval of more funding for the NEA to the artist protests outside a new exhibit that contained no combined religious iconography and excrement, to the classic story on the ‘Tony Danza Curriculum’ that harvested the cliches of arts education.
This week’s edition has a news brief on mission statements that’s sure to strike home with many organizations…in this case not actually about an arts organization:
Donut Shop’s Mission Statement Awfully Ambitious
FREEHOLD, NJ‹Patrons at Dotty’s Donuts on Cranston Avenue agree that the mission statement posted near the shop’s entrance seems overly ambitious. “It said, ‘At Dotty’s, our goal is to reinvent the morning,'” Dotty’s patron Ken Mentilli said. “‘Dotty’s Donuts are guaranteed to bring a smile to your face and a ray of light into your soul.’ That seems like a tall order for a donut shop.” Mentilli added that Dotty’s may not be able to deliver on its promise to “change the world, one fresh-baked bear claw at a time.”
FREEHOLD, NJ‹Patrons at Dotty’s Donuts on Cranston Avenue agree that the mission statement posted near the shop’s entrance seems overly ambitious. “It said, ‘At Dotty’s, our goal is to reinvent the morning,'” Dotty’s patron Ken Mentilli said. “‘Dotty’s Donuts are guaranteed to bring a smile to your face and a ray of light into your soul.’ That seems like a tall order for a donut shop.” Mentilli added that Dotty’s may not be able to deliver on its promise to “change the world, one fresh-baked bear claw at a time.”
