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Straight Up | Jan Herman

Arts, Media & Culture News with 'tude

PLUCKING STRINGS AND TALKING DOLLS

January 27, 2004 by cmackie

The staff thought you’d be interested in this darling guitar tidbit from Jim
Washburn’s Lost in OC column, The Music Industry Descends on Anaheim and Gives it a
Hickey
: “The 171-year-old Martin company unveiled its one-millionth
guitar, a commemorative model so ornately resplendent with mother of pearl and jewels that it
could double as a lighthouse reflector. One million, by the way, is a lot of guitars: Dave Matthews
plays the same brand Mark Twain and Hank Williams did; Martins were played during the Civil
War and soldiers today have taken them to Iraq; Dylan and others protested the Vietnam War
with a Martin, and Willie Nelson is opposing the current one with his.”


And how about this darling toy tidbit from Paul Krassner’s Zen Bastard column,
Rat Pack of One? “Talking Presidents, the toy
company that manufactures talking action figures at $30 each, is now marketing a Dennis Miller doll, to go along with the George W. Bush doll (‘You’re working hard to put
food on your family’), the Bill Clinton doll (‘It depends upon what the meaning
of the word is is’), the Donald Rumsfeld doll (‘I believe what I said yesterday — I don’t know what
I said, but I know what I think and I assume it’s what I said’) and the Ann Coulter doll (‘Swing voters are more
appropriately known as the idiot voters because they have no set of philosophical principles — by
the age of 14, you’re either a conservative or a liberal if you have an IQ above a toaster’).


Here’s a bonus: the George W.H. Bush doll (‘I’m President of the
United States and I’m not going to eat any more broccoli’). But the Rummy doll gets my vote.

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Jan Herman

When not listening to Bach or Cuban jazz pianist Chucho Valdes, or dancing to salsa, I like to play jazz piano -- but only in the privacy of my own mind.
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