1. No, not even slightly.
2. Mostly by grunting.
3. Yes, out of a can, acccompanied today by peanut butter and jelly and a pint of warm tap water.
5. Not a one–I’m too tired to hold them up in bed.
6. Like I swallowed a small sausage that got stuck halfway down.
7. Trust me, you don’t want to know.
8. Tomorrow, I hope, but don’t count on it.