A friend sent a variation of this to book/daddy. It's already making the rounds, it seems:
Most Honorable Sir:
You and I have never
met, but I had been told you are man of much integrity and Christian feelings. I
need to ask you to support an urgent secret business relationship with a
transfer of funds of great magnitude.
I am Ministry of the
Treasury of the Republic of America. My country has had crisis. It has
caused the need for large transfer of funds of 800 billion dollars US. If you
would assist me in this transfer, it would be most profitable to
you.
I am working with
Mr. Phillip Gram, lobbyist for UBS, who will be my replacement as Ministry of
the Treasury in January. You may know him as Senator Gram, leader of the
American banking deregulation in the 1990s. This transaction is 100% percent
safe. I assure.
This is matter of
great urgency. We need a blank check. We need the funds quickly. We cannot
directly transfer these funds in the names of our close friends because we are
constantly under surveillance by police. My family lawyer advised me that I
should look for a reliable and trustworthy person who will act as a next of kin
so the funds can be transferred.
Please reply with
all of your bank account, IRA and college fund account numbers and those of your
children and grandchildren. Plus Social Security. And anything you find
lying around that might have winning numbers. Lottery tickets or horse race
stubs. Email nformation to wallstreetbailout@treasury.gov so that we may
transfer your commission for said transaction. After I receive nformation, I
respond with details about safeguards that will be used to protect the funds.
Yours
Faithfully,
Minister of Treasury
Paulson
Money image from statebankofarthur.com
David Foster Wallace's suicide has left me pretty speechless. Uncomprehending, I guess. 