Archives for 2021

Hilary and I used to spend two or three weeks each winter on Florida’s Sanibel Island, our favorite place in the world. Alas, her deteriorating health caught up with her at last, and the doctors made her stop going there in 2016. It was always our plan to return as soon as she recovered from her double lung transplant. Instead, I lost Hilary and went straight from her deathbed into lockdown, after which I spent a painful year and a half learning to cope with that which I had most feared.

Then, six months ago, Cheril Mulligan and I fell in love, and though I’ll always miss Hilary, my life is once again full and joyous. One of these days I’ll take Cheril down to Sanibel—I know she’ll love it—but for now I’m more than content to live in the present and revel in the return of good fortune to my once-charmed, twice-blessed life.

I don’t need to know what’s to come next, which is a blessing, since it’s not given to any of us to know that. The only thing I know is that more surprises await me in 2022. Such being the case, allow me to quote Ogden Nash, as is my longstanding custom on the last day of the year:

Come, children, gather round my knee;
Something is about to be.

Tonight’s December Thirty-First,
Something is about to burst.

The clock is crouching, dark and small,
Like a time bomb in the hall.

Hark! It’s midnight, children dear.
Duck! Here comes another year.

If, like me, you have a sneaking suspicion that chance is in the saddle and rides mankind, then I hope the year to come treats you not unkindly, and that your lives, like mine, will be warmed by hope and filled with love—and if you feel otherwise, then I wish for you the very same thing. We all deserve to be loved on New Year’s Eve.

*  *  *

Ana Gasteyer sings “Defying Gravity,” written by Stephen Schwartz for the score of Wicked:

In today’s Wall Street Journal I review stage versions of A Christmas Carol in Providence, Rhode Island and Philadelphia. They can both be viewed in person and on line. Here’s an excerpt.

*  *  *

Staged versions of “A Christmas Carol” come in every possible flavor. In 2020, though, they were all streamed, for America’s theaters were still shut tight by COVID-19. This year, though, they’re mostly open again—at least for the moment—and several regional theaters have opted to break the long hiatus with productions of Charles Dickens’ holiday-themed classic, many of which are simultaneously being streamed to offer virus-shy patrons a safer way to enjoy the show.

One of the latter is Rhode Island’s Trinity Repertory Company, which has been performing its own version of “A Christmas Carol” for the past 45 years—it is restaged and reworked anew each season—and which has now brought it back to Trinity’s 500-seat Providence stage after a 20-month interregnum in public performances. It’s a broad, genially acted, multi-racial big-stage production that is comprehensively child-friendly…

Down in Philadelphia, the Lantern Theater Company, a top-tier troupe that I have yet to see live but which I fortuitously discovered early this year through streaming, is performing a one-man “Christmas Carol” played on a postage stamp-sized stage by Anthony Lawton, who wrote the adaptation in collaboration with Christopher Colucci (also the sound designer) and Thom Weaver (also scenic and lighting designer). The simple “set” consists of a wooden lectern that is turned on its side and pressed into multiple service as a couch and sundry other things.

As for the text, it has been partially rewritten and modernized by Messrs. Lawton, Colucci and Weaver, but in a way that preserves much of Dickens’ original, bringing long-overlooked lines to newly glittering life (“Darkness is cheap, and Scrooge liked it”) while commenting on others in a bold, immediate way that all but explodes off the stage….

*  *  *

Read the whole thing here.

I can’t remember anything in particular about how I spent Christmas last year. I didn’t want to, and still don’t. Not so Christmas of 2019, which I will never forget: I spent it with Hilary in the ICU of Columbia-Presbyterian Medical Center, where she had just been disconnected from the ECMO heart-lung machine that got her through a near-fatal respiratory crisis. (COVID has since taught the rest of the world about ECMOs, but I knew first.) “Our” tree that bleak year was a Charlie Brown-sized tabletop model on the counter of the nurses’ station, and it wasn’t even visible from the bed in Hilary’s ECMO-crowded cubicle.

She never had another one, nor did she leave the hospital again. A year later, I was a widower, and my sorrow blotted out the December sun, such as it was. As I wrote in this space on Christmas Eve:

I find myself in the same boat as pretty much everybody else, staying home, missing Hilary and my family, not seeing my friends save on a screen, and feeling…well, blue.

At my age, of course, you have no choice but to accept the increasingly obtrusive presence of death in your life. The fact that it has come so often around Christmastime, though, is a thing I find hard to tolerate. Something had to give, and what gave was my ability to celebrate Christmas. It’s not entirely gone: I still love A Christmas Carol, Meet Me in St. Louis, and all the wonderful seasonal songs. But there is no tree in my home, nor is my heart light, and both of these things were true last year as well.

For someone who has found boundless comfort and joy in Christmas through the years, first with my own family in Smalltown, U.S.A., and then with Hilary, this loss was grievous. “To be happy, not in memory but in the moment, is the shining star on the tree of life,” I wrote after trimming the first tree I shared with the woman who would soon become my wife.

I rejoice, then, to tell you that my star has risen again: I found a new partner six months ago, and today my beloved Cheril and I, as the song says, are close as pages in a book. Hilary wanted nothing more than for me to find a new love after her inevitable passing, so I am in no doubt that she would have approved.

On Thursday Cheril will pick me up in Manhattan and drive me out to Long Island, where she lives and works, to spend the long weekend celebrating a holiday that has come back to life for me. Among other things, we both love Christmas movies and plan to watch a stack of them, and she’s also promised to drive me around Long Island to look at Christmas lights, the gaudier the better. While we’ll be seeing her mother at some point in the day, we mainly plan to be together, reveling in the great good fortune that is ours. Cheril has a tree, but it is our mutual happiness that will be our shining star.

*  *  *

Judy Garland sings “Have Yourself a Merry Christmas” in Vincente Minnelli’s Meet Me in St. Louis. The song is by Hugh Martin and Ralph Blane and the orchestral arrangement is by Conrad Salinger:

Bing Crosby sings “Close as Pages in a Book,” by Dorothy Fields and Sigmund Romberg. This performance, arranged by John Scott Trotter, was recorded in 1945: