{"id":1784,"date":"2019-05-03T09:24:21","date_gmt":"2019-05-03T08:24:21","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.artsjournal.com\/performancemonkey\/?p=1784"},"modified":"2019-05-03T09:24:36","modified_gmt":"2019-05-03T08:24:36","slug":"property-details","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.artsjournal.com\/performancemonkey\/2019\/05\/property-details.html","title":{"rendered":"Property details"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
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Rosmersholm, a desirable 19th century mansion has\nunexpectedly come on the market, following recent\u2026 events. Impeccably designed,\nit would suit a miserable man of the cloth or a radical thinker struggling with\ndoubt and desire. Full disclosure: there is a slight problem with damp.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Dimensions<\/strong> It\u2019s\nbig. Very big. We like to describe it as \u2018size of a West End stage\u2019-type big. Buyers\nwill find ample room for crises of conscience, blackmail attempts by political\nrivals, accusations of infidelity and confessions of attempted murder.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Atmosphere<\/strong> Rosmersholm\nhas a unique atmosphere, accrued over time. Visitors are reminded of the Marie\nCeleste, or the lost city of Atlantis. It\u2019s an undeniably impressive house, and\nas our Mr Ibsen likes to remark, \u2018a house is not a home.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n

D\u00e9cor<\/strong> The\nhouse is decorated in painstakingly subdued tones. Take a moment to appreciate\nthe dank blues and greens that give the subtle sensation of sinking down, down,\ndown beneath the fjord, gasping for air as the icy waters close above you.\nPerfect for parties. (Full disclosure: only awkward luncheons with estranged\nrelatives are permitted at Rosmersholm.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Lighting<\/strong>\nRosmersholm prides itself on its elegant lighting. Taking full advantage of the\ndespondent surroundings, the light is powdery, as if the dust of unbroken\ntradition hangs stiflingly in the air. Inhabitants can relax and enjoy the\nsense that they are drowning, choking, seeing their hopes recede as they descend\nfar below the surface.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Portraits<\/strong> Buyers\nwill be pleased that the portraits that fill every wall of the main room\nfurnish you with a full set of disapproving ancestors. There\u2019s no need to bring\nyour own \u2013 possibly inappropriately cheerful \u2013 family pictures. Nothing says \u2018home\u2019\nmore than 200 years of icy masculine eyes glaring down from the walls and\nfinding you wanting. Sit down and luxuriate in generations-worth of contempt\nfor your puny attempts to break free from the dead hand of the patriarchy!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Flooring<\/strong> A cautionary\nnote. The floors appear elegantly appointed, but previous occupants note that during\nbitter arguments, agitated discussions or emotional confrontations, you may\nfind yourself anchored to the floor, standing in profile and seemingly unable\nto move for minutes at a time. This is a peculiarly Norwegian condition which\nloosely translates as \u2018directed by Ian Rickson\u2019. Gentlemen generally resign\nthemselves to this state, though a Ms Hayley Atwell was often observed to be\ncrouching uncomfortably, as though desperately trying to spring into movement,\nyet forever thwarted. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Nursery<\/strong> Some\nbuyers imagine the nursery is sound-proofed, as no child of the Rosmers has\never been heard to cry. But you may prefer to keep the nursery unused, as who\nwould wish to bring a child into this joyless, joyless world? <\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Staff<\/strong> The\nhouse comes with a full team of quietly resentful servants. They do not speak,\nbut will serve you mutely at dinner, scurry from the room in wordless agitation\nand read radical newspapers in the corners. They will ardently desire your\ndownfall, and serve fermented trout to guests. The housekeeper, Mrs Helseth, is\nan asset to any establishment, with her impeccable accounting, dark hints about\nfamily secrets, and periodic visions of white horses heralding untimely and\npossibly unnatural deaths.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Work needed<\/strong>\nProspective buyers should be aware that the house will demand some work. They\nshould expect to abandon their dreams of social justice and personal fulfilment;\nlose their faith yet struggle to find new ideals; and to resign themselves to\nnever hearing laughter ever again. Also, they might need to address the damp.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Garden<\/strong> There\nis no garden as such, though Rosmersholm is set amid desolate landscape offering\naccess to a grimly repressive and censorious town. The town offers all necessary\namenities: a political class riddled with fear and contempt, and a culture of vicious\ngossip that will drive outsiders to disgrace or death. Closer to home is a\nfootbridge (for god\u2019s sake avoid the footbridge) over a mill pond. The mill turns\nremorselessly, except for those unforeseen occasions when it\u2026 sticks. On an\nobject \u2013 the size of the pastor\u2019s late wife, for example \u2013 in the water. Which\nreminds us:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Damp<\/strong> There is\na slight problem with damp.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Rosmersholm<\/a> is at the Duke of York\u2019s Theatre, London. Ibsen\u2019s play is in a version by Duncan MacMillan, with Hayley Atwell, Tom Burke, Giles Terera and Lucy Briers. Direction: Ian Rickson. Design: Rae Smith. Lighting: Neil Austin. Photos: Johan Persson<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Follow David on Twitter: @mrdavidjays<\/a><\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Rosmersholm, a desirable 19th century mansion has unexpectedly come on the market, following recent\u2026 events. Impeccably designed, it would suit a miserable man of the cloth or a radical thinker struggling with doubt and desire. Full disclosure: there is a slight problem with damp. Dimensions It\u2019s big. Very big. We like to describe it as […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":1786,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_genesis_hide_title":false,"_genesis_hide_breadcrumbs":false,"_genesis_hide_singular_image":false,"_genesis_hide_footer_widgets":false,"_genesis_custom_body_class":"","_genesis_custom_post_class":"","_genesis_layout":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[247,563,646,34],"class_list":{"0":"post-1784","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-uncategorized","8":"tag-design","9":"tag-hayley-atwell","10":"tag-rae-smith","11":"tag-theatre","12":"entry"},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.artsjournal.com\/performancemonkey\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1784","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.artsjournal.com\/performancemonkey\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.artsjournal.com\/performancemonkey\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.artsjournal.com\/performancemonkey\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.artsjournal.com\/performancemonkey\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1784"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.artsjournal.com\/performancemonkey\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1784\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1789,"href":"https:\/\/www.artsjournal.com\/performancemonkey\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1784\/revisions\/1789"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.artsjournal.com\/performancemonkey\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/1786"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.artsjournal.com\/performancemonkey\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1784"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.artsjournal.com\/performancemonkey\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1784"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.artsjournal.com\/performancemonkey\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1784"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}