{"id":315,"date":"2009-08-17T10:14:34","date_gmt":"2009-08-17T10:14:34","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.artsjournal.com\/lifesapitch\/wp\/?p=315"},"modified":"2009-08-17T10:14:34","modified_gmt":"2009-08-17T10:14:34","slug":"what_happens_when_you_dont_ope","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.artsjournal.com\/lifesapitch\/2009\/08\/what_happens_when_you_dont_ope\/","title":{"rendered":"What happens when you don’t open your computer all weekend"},"content":{"rendered":"

After trying to dodge the thing Frogger-style, I finally read the (third? 700th?) George Steel profile in the <\/a>Times<\/a>. <\/i>All I will say is that in the piece, he’s compared to The President of the United States of America, “another newcomer to a tough job in a time of crisis.” I wonder when publicists will start comparing artists to Obama in their press releases. I’m sure it’s already happened. <\/p>\n

I was forwarded an e mail about a new classical music gossip site called The Cereal List<\/i><\/a>. Despite the fact that my readers did not seem to get behind Pitch Snitch<\/a>, ahem, I remain convinced that more gossipy blogs – notably OperaChic<\/i><\/a> and Parterre Box<\/a><\/i> – are some of the best things in the industry. Unfortunately, the introduction e mail to The Cereal List<\/i> included a fake teaser about Cecilia Bartoli hooking up with Joshua Bell, calling it “an Ashton and Demi thing” (Mmm…Google it: Bartoli is about one year older than Bell). Additionally, this intro e mail was sent from the super secret aspiring gossip columnist’s Personal E mail Address, which is really amazing. These big little initial missteps don’t inspire much confidence, and I’m not entirely sure how (if?) they’re going to fact-check, but take a gander<\/a> and decide for yourselves. <\/p>\n

Not unsurprisingly, One Hundred people forwarded me the news of the Streisand Village Vanguard concert<\/a> a couple weeks back. First, it’s genius because I actually thought you had to pre-order the CD to enter to win tickets, but there’s small print that says you don’t. Point is, had my sister not corrected me, ~17 copies of Love is the Answer <\/i>would have arrived (for different names) at my doorstep. <\/i>That is some good, trixy marketing. However, my intern Nate took a close look at the rules<\/a> (and nooo, I did not make him do that as part of his job) and found this oddity: Any potential winner who resides in Canada will first be required to
\ncorrectly answer a skill-testing (arithmetical) question as a condition
\nof winning.<\/i><\/p>\n

\"CanadiansStreisand.jpg\"<\/span>What now? I mean, how’s that? <\/p>\n

Something like this, maybe:<\/p>\n

A cruise ship sinks in the Atlantic and half of the survivors make it to a desert island. There are enough copies of The Way We Were <\/i>to last 14 people 2 weeks. 4 days later, the ship sent to rescue the survivors also sinks, drowning 6.5 crew members and 33 Color Me Barbra<\/i> records, leaving an
\nadditional 7 people stranded on the island to now share the 1 copy of Streisand Superman<\/i>. The Art obviously has to be re-rationed, but everyone is now on half of the original ration, so how many days in total from the day of the original sinking would it take for a shipment of Yentl <\/i>DVDs to reach the island?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

After trying to dodge the thing Frogger-style, I finally read the (third? 700th?) George Steel profile in the Times. All I will say is that in the piece, he’s compared to The President of the United States of America, “another newcomer to a tough job in a time of crisis.” I wonder when publicists will […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_genesis_hide_title":false,"_genesis_hide_breadcrumbs":false,"_genesis_hide_singular_image":false,"_genesis_hide_footer_widgets":false,"_genesis_custom_body_class":"","_genesis_custom_post_class":"","_genesis_layout":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[9],"tags":[],"class_list":{"0":"post-315","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","6":"category-main","7":"entry"},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.artsjournal.com\/lifesapitch\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/315","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.artsjournal.com\/lifesapitch\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.artsjournal.com\/lifesapitch\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.artsjournal.com\/lifesapitch\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.artsjournal.com\/lifesapitch\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=315"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.artsjournal.com\/lifesapitch\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/315\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.artsjournal.com\/lifesapitch\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=315"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.artsjournal.com\/lifesapitch\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=315"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.artsjournal.com\/lifesapitch\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=315"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}