{"id":5961,"date":"2013-04-04T10:52:07","date_gmt":"2013-04-04T14:52:07","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.artsjournal.com\/herman\/?p=5961"},"modified":"2013-04-05T13:40:37","modified_gmt":"2013-04-05T17:40:37","slug":"clever-nubbing-can-pass-for-shakespeare","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.artsjournal.com\/herman\/2013\/04\/clever-nubbing-can-pass-for-shakespeare.html","title":{"rendered":"
‘Taking the Piss’ That May Pass for Shakespeare<\/center>"},"content":{"rendered":"

I spent more than a decade reviewing theater for a major metro daily and I’d never heard the term “nubbing (or taking the piss).” Hmmph. Heathcote Williams<\/a> shows how it’s done in a sweet folio about to be published by Gerard Bellaart<\/a>‘s Cold Turkey Press<\/a>. As my good friend N.O. Mustill<\/a> says via email, “me nostrils flare, aquiver at the delicious line: ‘Lest wind-filled sprites bequim the air.’<\/em>”<\/p>\n

\"'Nubbing'<\/a><\/a><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

Sometimes an actor will find himself on stage
\nHaving forgotten what he\u2019s meant to say.
\nHe\u2019s dried completely; his prompter\u2019s in the pub;
\nAnd it\u2019s the middle of a Shakespeare play.<\/p>\n

But as it\u2019s Shakespeare (and Shakespeare\u2019s often obscure),
\nActors have a nonsensical trick to cover this.
\nIt\u2019s a thespian ploy called \u2018nubbing,\u2019 but few people notice
\nWhen an actor\u2019s \u2018nubbing\u2019 (or taking the piss):<\/p>\n

“. . . List, I sense a nubbing in far glens,
\nWhere minnows swoop the pikey deep
\nWhich is unpiked less pikey be,
\nCross-bolted in their crispy muffs<\/p>\n

And choose the trammelled way.
\nOh freeze my soul in fitful sleep
\nLest wind-filled sprites bequim the air
\nAnd take us singly or in threes<\/p>\n

In mad agog or lumpsome nub,
\nAghast to Milford Haven… .”<\/em>
\nThese Shakespeare-like cod phrases are used to fill the chasm,
\nAnd they tumble over each other in nervous succession.<\/p>\n

There\u2019s only one rule governing what the \u2018nubber\u2019 invents:
\nThat the last phrase to ring in an audience\u2019s ears
\nMust always be \u2018Milford Haven,\u2019 and be shouted out loudly
\nSo those backstage can be alerted, then they\u2019ll gather<\/p>\n

That a forgetful actor has had to fall back on \u2018nubbing\u2019,
\nAnd that he yearns to be rescued without hesitation \u2013
\n\u2018Aghast to Milford Haven!\u2019 \u2018. . . to Milford Haven!!\u2019 \u2018. . . Milford Haven!!!\u2019<\/strong><\/em>
\n\u2013 The actor who\u2019s dried cries out in grim desperation.<\/p>\n

But if he happens to be unpopular he may be left there to hang,
\nIn that spotlight that normally fills him with such elation,
\nSo frantically he\u2019ll try to make up more and more nonsense,
\nBut always making sure to finish with \u2018Milford Haven.\u2019<\/em><\/p>\n

For these two words are the secret signals that indicate
\nThat someone\u2019s lost on stage, frozen without a clue,
\nAnd may be in imminent danger of dying a thousand deaths,
\nUntil a kindly cast member can come to their rescue.<\/p>\n

To an audience a clever \u2018nub\u2019 can pass for Shakespeare himself
\nSo someone seeing Hamlet, the Danish prince,
\nMay be transported by the tormented egghead\u2019s sorry predicament \u2013
\nUnwittingly they\u2019ve been manipulated by gibberish:<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd now, methinks, I must away to horse,
\nMy nub is sorely pressed and, hark, the eagle,
\nSoaring high and cawing like the creature of the night,
\nThe shard-born raven, proclaims we are bemused
\nAnd struck so far from finding our next line
\nThat happy is the man at home in Milford Haven.\u201d<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

Then, on catching the \u2018Milford Haven\u2019 cue, a fellow actor will step out
\nFrom the wings to save the day; to partake in the conspiracy
\nAnd, suppressing a giggle, he picks up from where the real play left off
\nBut the forged Shakespeare \u2018nub\u2019 enters green room history.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

<\/center><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I spent more than a decade reviewing theater for a major metro daily and I’d never heard the term “nubbing (or taking the piss).” Hmmph. Heathcote Williams shows how it’s done in a sweet folio about to be published by Gerard Bellaart‘s Cold Turkey Press. As my good friend N.O. Mustill says via email, “me […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_genesis_hide_title":false,"_genesis_hide_breadcrumbs":false,"_genesis_hide_singular_image":false,"_genesis_hide_footer_widgets":false,"_genesis_custom_body_class":"","_genesis_custom_post_class":"","_genesis_layout":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[18],"tags":[],"class_list":{"0":"post-5961","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","6":"category-literature","7":"entry","8":"has-post-thumbnail"},"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/pbvgEs-1y9","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.artsjournal.com\/herman\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5961","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.artsjournal.com\/herman\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.artsjournal.com\/herman\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.artsjournal.com\/herman\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.artsjournal.com\/herman\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5961"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.artsjournal.com\/herman\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5961\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.artsjournal.com\/herman\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5961"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.artsjournal.com\/herman\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5961"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.artsjournal.com\/herman\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5961"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}