Results tagged “lloyd webber” from Slipped disc
The BBC's Culture Show ran a 30-minute special last night on Alfred Brendel. It went out at 11.20 pm and showed no more than 30 seconds at a stretch - at least so long as my eyelids stayed up - of the cheeky chappie doing what he used to do best, which is playing the piano.
Instead, the media-savvy conductor Charles Hazlewood quizzed Mr Brendel reverentially about his poetry, which he recited with seesawing eyebrows, a feat I have not seen replicated since the early years of television comedy.
Mr Hazlewood expressed polite surprise that the rhythm and metre of the poems was so musical. Mr Brendel was charmed by that exceptionally acute critical observation.
What was the BBC doing putting out such obsequious blether? Nothing for classical music.
Take one of the great living pianists, but don't show him playing a movement of a Beethoven sonata. Oh no, that might lose audience share, even when the show is carefully put out after all but the night shift have gone to bed.
BBC Television is frightened and ashamed of classical music. Mark Thompson, the director general, wishes it were otherwise. But his policy directive has so far made no impact whatsoever on the production teams and the channel controllers.
Imagine what went on at the planning meeting.
Charlie: Alfred Brendel is about to retire - you know, the great pianist.
Adam: What does he play?
Charlie: Beethoven, Mozart, a little Schubert.
Adam: Not for our audience.
Charlie: He does other things, you know. He writes nonsense verse.
Adam: That's interesting. Like Edward Lear, you mean?
Charlie: More T. S. Eliot.
Adam: Wasn't he the one that wrote Cats with Andrew Lloyd Webber? OK, go for it - but no classical music, mind. Not on my watch.
An excited reader has notified me that Playboy magazine is running a feature titled Too Hot to Handel: the sexiest babes in classical music.
Before you waste a moment's click on the site, let me assure you that all of them are decorously clad. Along with the all-too predictable Anna Netrebko and Danielle de Niese, Playboy has selected violinists Leila Josefowicz, Julia Fischer, Janine Jansen, Hilary Hahn and Anne-Sophie Mutter, the last in a photograph that must have been taken at least ten years ago, or in very flattering light. Ms Mutter is described as Austrian - she's German - and a MILF, which is a term that does not bear cultural elucidation.
Two relative unknowns are included. One is the oboist of the Los Angeles Philharmonic and the other, perhaps, someone's girlfriend.
All good clean fun, right? Wrong.
Let me tell you a story. Ten years ago, a Finnish violinist called Linda Lampenius allowed herself to be talked into posing nude for Playboy under the stage name Linda Brava. Her centrefold appearance landed an EMI record contract and an avalanche of media attention. Her first record reached number 14 in the UK charts and there was no follow-up. She was taken up as a talent by Sir Andrew Lloyd Webber, and quickly dropped. She appeared on Baywatch, just the once.
A victim of unrealistic expectations, Linda went through years of turmoil before making her way back home to Finland, where a producer friend of mine recorded her some months ago playing chamber music - rather well, he said. The story has a happy ending. Linda, 38, is expecting her first baby in the coming weeks. Let's wish her well.
The Playboy experience is not to be recommended as a means of advancing a musical career. It's exploitation, that's the bare truth. Don't bother to look.
One morning before too long, you will wake up and find last night's opera premiere reviewed in your paper by Covent Garden's chief executive and the new play at the National by a drizzle of audience comments.
The role of arts critic is being eroded and, unless we do something about it, discussion of the arts will soon be monopolised by promoters - as it is already on TV talent shows - and by the unaccountable whimsy of bloggers.
American newspapers are shedding critics as the first line of economy. In Britain review space has shrunk and some forms - television criticism, for instance - are being abolished.
Is that such a bad thing? I hear you ask. What are critics, anyway, except a bunch of curmudgeons who are paid to pour scorn over our favourite stars? Why do they so rarely have a nice word to say for new musicals?
Why, indeed. To answer that, you have to go back three hundred years to Swift and Addison who invented the profession of criticism - perhaps even further to Aristotle, who laid down the rules of aesthetics and the tradition of debate. What critics have done ever since is to apply expert analytical skills and years of experience to all they see and hear.
Most critics I know are inveterate optimists who go out night after night in the fond expectation of finding genius. Their disappointment is recorded more in sorrow than in rage, and their comments form an essential part of creative self-correction. Without critics, the arts go into reverse and democracy gives way to mob rule.
It is a thankless task, criticism. Artists hate being told where they went wrong and editors don't like to offend billionaire advertisers. It's a thankless job, but unless we cherish it, we stand to lose one of our oldest freedoms. So read the reviews this morning and enjoy the range of comment on the page. It may not be there forever.
And here's the URL for the ensuing Night Waves discussion with Andrew Dickson of Guardian online and Susannah Clapp of the Observer. http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b00dwgnk
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