"People will see me and cry." -the remake of 'Fame'

Apologies in advance if this post is idiotic.

The remake of Fame is to be held accountable, you see, because I am convinced that in the one hundred and seven minutes I sat watching it in the Ziegfeld theater tonight, I actually became less intelligent. I asked my sister if we could leave halfway through, and she insisted, "I'm not leaving before The Song." The most amazing part, though, is that after we suffered through the thing in all its plotless, driveling, anesthetized glory, THEY DIDN'T EVEN SING THE SONG. THERE WAS NO DANCING ON THE CAR. "Fame" played DURING THE CREDITS! Sigh. "Lame! What a misguid-ed endeavor. I want to know who's to blame. Forget-it, forget-it forget-it forget-it..."

As usual, our friend classical music is portrayed as The Dragon Guarding the Castle of True Self-Expression. The only way one character can get her parents to an intimate but funky club (which turns out to be Webster Hall??) is by telling them they're going to a "classical jazz" concert. Once her parents are safely in the audience, she casts aside her good-girl classical piano-playing image and sings Rap. You can tell she's now a Rap Singer and not a Classical Musician because she has traded in her pink-on-pink polo and sweater combination for big hoop earrings and a checkered "top". Another cool young thing is artistically stifled by being asked to play Bach in his piano lesson. THANKFULLY there's an upright and a sound system in the cafeteria so everyone can jam and be themselves at lunchtime.

Two interesting things, though, in this desert: One, there's a scene in which the two repressed classical music kids and one self-declared rapper-slash-actor are in a meeting with Lauryn Hill's A&R guy. I would throw up a "spoiler alert" here, but really I don't think anyone should see this movie. So, they're in their second meeting, and apparently the higher-ups at the label weren't interested in the guys' music, but they do think the classical pianist-turned-singer's talent is "one in a million" or whatever. Now to the point: this A&R guy says to her, "We're working on a lot of 360 deals right now, partnering with Live Nation and Clear Channel." That's the first time I've heard 360 deals referenced anywhere outside of the music industry, although I know there's been a lot of mainstream media coverage. This was an especially good Times piece on the subject a couple years ago:

Commonly known as "multiple rights" or "360" deals, the new pacts emerged in an early iteration with the deal that Robbie Williams, the British pop singer signed with EMI in 2002. They are now used by all the major record labels and even a few independents. Madonna has been the most prominent artist to sign on (her recent $120 million deal with the concert promoter Live Nation allows it to share in her future earnings), but the majority of these new deals are made with unknown acts.

It's not possible to tabulate the number of acts working under 360 deals, but worldwide, record labels share in the earnings with such diverse acts as Lordi, a Finnish metal band which has its own soft drink and credit card, and Camila, a Mexican pop trio that has been drawing big crowds to its concerts. In the United States, Interscope Records benefits from the marketing spinoffs from the Pussycat Dolls, including a Dolls-theme nightclub in Las Vegas.

The second interesting thing is that this movie took itself very, very seriously, whereas similar but more successful versions of the same idea--like the TV show Glee or the High School Musical movies--have a thick layer of self-awareness and self-mockery. The movies Center Stage and Step Up also took themselves seriously and were also far less commercially successful than Glee and certainly than the High School Musical franchise. I think Newsies, swoon, took itself seriously when it first came out, but now it reads like it's making fun of itself. Also, it can be argued that Newsies is a kind of cult film, whereas Glee and High School Musical have mainstream appeal.

And finally, there is no way that the High School for the Performing Arts would be able to do a student production of Chicago in New York City when the musical is still on Broadway. There are rules about these things. Fact. Check.