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May 12, 2005

CODE RED BARON: LEADERSHIP BRAVES TERROR 'BLITZ'

Taking care of the nation's business as usual, our Dear Leader was tooling around on his bicycle at noon yesterday, just back from his globe-trotting photo op, when the terror alert went to Code Red, jets were scrambled, the Capitol was cleared and police told everyone: "Run. Get out. Keep running. ... We're under attack."

Democratic minority leader Nancy Pelosi said police "pulled me out of my shoes," CNN reported. They whisked her off, along with other pols, several Supreme Court Justices, and Cheney Boy to secure locations. MSNBC.com's headline blared, "D.C.'s BIG SCARE." The Washington Post merely shouted, "Confused Fliers Trigger Capital Scare." Dear Leader was oblivious to the mad dash for safety because nobody told him what was happening until he finished his bicycle ride. Which captured the moment perfectly.

A TV-viewing friend writes:

So I'm sitting here watching a swarm of squealing piglets flee Capitol Hill from a little Cessna two-seater, not quite the Red Baron's bi-plane. Makes me long for those puny limp-wristed Londoners who refused to run during The Blitz. Red-faced little rotten-toothed cowardly faggots, one and all -- but my kind of folks. And I'm laughing my ass off at this CNN clown, one Joe Johns, a ballsy reporter who's describing his narrow escape. Reminds me of Duke Wayne's heroic WW2 exploits. Is it an axiom that lives without any justification at all are the ones most worth preserving?
No charges were filed against the fliers. That, too, captured the spirit of Homeland Security's latest Code Red alert.

Posted by at May 12, 2005 10:11 AM

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